Cinderella Shinigami Style!
by Mord5ith
Summary: She wasn't strong, she wasn't smart and because of that she will die there. The only choice to make was if she'd rather starve herself to death or die trying to get some food. "Just let me die..." she prayed."My heart is already bleeding..." ByaxOC mainly
1. Prologue

When I started writing this, I was thinking about something simple, funny and quite stupid. But then, it changed before my eyes and here it is. Not the happiest of the beginnings. But, hey, who knows!

* * *

She wasn't the strongest, she wasn't the smartest, she wasn't the most beutiful.

So, she thought, she was just a weak, stupid, ugly girl.

That didn't really matter. Not anymore.

Because the weak, stupid, ugly girl, now was a dead, weak, stupid, ugly girl.

She smiled bitterly to herself.

Before her death, she was nothing. But at least, she was alive.

* * *

Death, she found out, wasn't how she imagined it to be.

Where was God? Where were the clouds? And why was it so similiar to an old japan town?

She frowned. Was it heaven? Was it hell? Something in the middle? Something else?

So... here she was... alone in this strange town. Soul society, the strange guy in black pj's called it.

Well... maybe it was all a dream.

* * *

Two days later, she discovered two things.

First of all, it lasted too long to be a dream.

Secondly, she was too hungry.

And finally, if she was really dead, this place was hell.

She has seen things. Bad things. Things she thought men weren't able to do.

She has seen people literally at each others throat. People killing other people with bare hands, a feral grin on their faces.

She has met raped women. And she couldn't do anything.

she couldn't protect them. She couldn't even protect herself.

She was... nothing. Again.

* * *

Soon, she felt the same feral instincts inside her.

Food. Se needed food.

And if she only had the strength, she would have hunted down the first innocent soul with food.

She felt like an animal now.

A trapped one.

She forgot her name. Her origin. Her true nature.

She forgot her age and appearance.

She knew just this: she wasn't strong, she wasn't smart and because of that she will die there. The only choice to make was if she'd rather starve herself to death or die trying to get some food.

She didn't had time to make this choice. Because there, at each passing second, her life was on the line.

Because if some of that fucking blood men found her, she wouldn't able to fight back.

Because she was weak.

And she really hated that.

* * *

"How can I fight back?" she whispered into the night. "How can I protect myself?" she hissed, falling on her knees. "How can I keep my heart, here?"

Tears fell from her eyes.

"What can I do? What will be of my soul?" she asked to nobody. "What offence did I commit which took me in this unholy place?"

"What good I gained from my human sacrifices? From my work? Where are the awards of my kindness?" she cried. "Am I a beast like these cursed men?"

There, on her knees, she pressed her hands together, praying.

"Please... let me die. Kill me now, before my conscience gets corrupted." she prayed. "Kill me now, before my body gets tainted." she said sobbing. "Kill me now, before I lose my mind and my heart."

"Just let me die..." she prayed one more time. "Don't let me wake up from my slumber."

"My heart is already bleeding. Give it the final blown."

* * *

She did woke up.


	2. Fairy mother and Prince Charming

Twenty years had passed since that day, and the girl had grown into a woman. Even if her body didn't change at all her maturity was clearly visible.

She didn't got taller, nor her breast grew bigger, on the contrary, she got thinner and she paler. Soul society didn't let her body age, but it had to endure such strenuous condition, it would have been impossible for it to stay the same.

However, in soul society, physical appearance was a bluff. Everybody knew it. So they didn't give a damn if you looked like an ten years old or fifty. Yes, they could tease or pick on you about that, but in the end, it didn't matter. Souls recognized the others' age but their eyes.

The rookies, had always those hopeful, slight terrified eyes. They were scared, but their hope enlightened their eyes. They thought they could escape. They thought everything was going to be alright.

Then there were the ones who thought they had no hope. Who thought that that was their life and they had to deal with it. They made sure the world keep spinning. They worked, they fought, they bought food and tried to get stronger or more important, so they could survive longer.

Finally, there were the veterans. The ones who knew that there was nothing to do. That it was useless keep struggling. They were already dead. They got nothing to loose. And they just had to live until they died again. No work, no fight, no food. They were death inside.

Of course, this is true for the district which were furthest from Seiretei.

Our woman lived there. She managed to move to a lower district years ago, and she had to admit it was a lot better there. But it wasn't an easy task. Moving had taken a lot of persuading... and with persuading, she meant money and... _stuff_. Nothing she was proud about. Her days there, made it impossible for her to look at her reflection in the mirror. But there, in the highest districts in Rukongai, it counted as nothing.

When she moved, she found a man willing to take her in. If her after-life hadn't teach her to be always distrustful, she could have been almost happy. He was a kind man and they talked together while crossing the boundary of a district, to go through the other. In reality, the girl hadn't speak at all, but the man seemed to be ok with his monologue. He told her about his hobbies, his passion and his "bad habit" (how his wife and friend called it) to make sure as much people as possible were moved in better district and how he was married and had two daughters. He asked a lot of rhetorical question, without never expecting her to answer. It was like he knew her difficulty to open up.

But fate was cruel with her once again. After he let her in his house, he was killed. That "bad habit" of his got him killed. She got him killed. People from the 68th didn't want some _beast_ from the 84 in their district. How could she blame them?

However, his family took her in, saying she had to repay her debt, because the money she gave to the father of their family were stolen by his killer. She became her maid, and she was glad. Because she didn't have to sell her body or committing homicide. She was ok with that.

At the moment, she was doing the laundry while her "sisters" (if you want to call her so) were dressing up. Today, the shinigami academy opened its doors to the shinigami wanna be. People from all the district gathered in Seireitei. She knew her sisters didn't have a high spiritual power, seeing as little they eat, but their mother wanted them to become shinigami, so they were following her wish.

"Hey, girl." the mother yelled, "come here! There's a stain on Drizella dress!"

The girl sighed, knowing full well that the dress was clean just two minutes ago. Probably, the girl stained it eating practically on it. "I'm coming!" she shouted in reply.

* * *

She didn't remember what happened. In a moment, she was waving at her supposed family and the next, she was listening to a woman ranting about possibility and potentiality.

"Understood?" the woman asked her.

She just frowned.

"So... let me get it right... you think I should go to Seireitei and become a shinigami because I have an high reiatsu?"

"Well..." she replied, "It's not exactily high. But it's higher than most of people here. So you should try."

"No, no... I have to stay here. I have to work, I need more money..."

"The hell are you talking about? You can earn more being a shinigami!" reasoned the older woman.

"No, I have to repay my debt. That's it, stop."

"You can repay it later, girl."

"No. I have to go, now." she said, standing up.

"Take this shoes. They'll make you faster, you can go, pass the exam, and come back. Nobody will know it. Try... please." the woman tried again, taking out of her purse a strange pair of trainers.

"I won't."

"Take this. Make this old woman happy. Don't refuse my little present."

* * *

So, here she was, her mousy brown hair she usually gathered in a ponytail were down, wearing a pair of sunglasses, hoping to be concealed from her "family" eyes. She didn't know what possessed her, but soon after the strange woman had left, she started thinking about her words. And decided that she could give it a try.

"I'm proud to announce the opening of Seireitei doors for whoever wants to become a shinigami. First test, in the 12th squad building. We will measure your reiatsu. Second test, you will asked to perform a simple kidou, third test the hand to hand combat, fourth test, the history of Soul Society. Everybody able to call a shikai, will pass, but will have to do only the first three tests, just so we can be sure of his level and put him in the right class. Good luck." Yamamoto sou-taicho announced. After his short short speech, everybody rushed to the building she assumed was the 12th squad's. It was useless.

It would take hours before the first wave of applicant could be tested, so she thought of making a brieft tour... maybe she could gain something... shinigamiwere rich, right? So, she began walking, the magic trainer at her feet made her faster. She remember her trip. Such a speed she thought she would collide with herself, if she just stopped... she was surprised in finding out she still had her shadow behind her.

She keep running, until she was in front of a great manor. _Wow_, she observed, _it's... enormous._

Break in the manor was quite simple, and she found herself quite taken aback about that. She didn't waste time. She started mooching a lot of things, things she could sell, and then, she was almost out when...

"What do you think you're doing here?"

She stopped in track. Fuck. "Just passing by." she answered, without losing her cool.

The man in front of her remained impassible, even if in reality, he was trying hard to not lift an eyebrow. "This is my propriety. I don't recall asking you to pass by."

"Oh." she replied with an expression that matched his. "Then I'm in the wrong house."

"Very wrong indeed. You're in the Kuchiki manor... and I don't think a punk with sunglasses like you fits in a place like this."

She shrugged. "Maybe not. But the door was open."

The man almost snorted. Almost. "There's a reason for that. Nobody would every dream to break in the Kuchiki propriety."

"Ah..." she nodded. "And who's this Kuchiki guy, exactely?"

"Me."

"Well, got to go, Kuchiki-san. See ya around." she said, waving at him before leaping out the window. The man blinked before running after her. _Hell, this girl is fast!_he thought in awe. She could be a hard match for him. Who knows, maybe even Yourichi.

The girl smiled to herself. No way in hell people could catch her. Then, a figure appeared, blocking her race. Well... she should have stopped herself, but it was like she was used to this speed. So she just crashed again his body. "What the heck!" she yelled, after she fell with a thump.

The man didn't move an inch, and looked down at her. "What made you think you could outrun a Taicho?"

"Dunno, Kuchiki-san."

"Give me what is mine."

"Or... else?"

"Or else."

"I can outrun you. However... I'm not thief. If you need your stuff, here..." she said putting down her plunder. "Take them back. But don't say you can outrun me, Taicho." Then, she did something very unlike her. She leaned closer to him and whispered coldly. "Catch me."

The girl ran off and soon the noble had to accept something that hurt his pride and tickle his curiosity... A smile threatened to appear on his lips. He wasn't able to catch her... yet.

* * *

Sorry for the wait! My life has been hectic. Since the last chapter, I celebrated my 18th birthday, found out I'm having a baby girl and my fianceé proposed me. Isn't mine such a perfect life? XD


	3. First test and endless stars

"Your name?"

The voice belonged to a seated member of the 12th squad. That day, the division was busier than the usual. The shinigami academy was recruiting, so that meant he had to work a lot harder. He wondered if he would be able to come back home that day. He was really starting to doubt it.

The girl opened his mouth and then closed it. Her name. She couldn't remember her name. She could remember anything about her life.

"I need to know your name. If you aren't going to-"

"Tanshin" she replied, cutting the man off. It wasn't really her name... but during her stay in Soul Society, she chose a new name for herself. She thought about thousand of names and meanings. For years she didn't even have a name. Who needs a name if you can't maintain any morsel of dignity? What use has a name, if people won't consider you worth of being called by it? A name don't deserve to be yelled in the night by cruel voices. No name should be pronounced with such a venom which can make you forget who you are. So, really, being nameless was better for the soul of the 84th.

And she was tainted. And every name she would have chosen would have been too. So how could she chose one of the popular names? Japanese female names had always graceful meanings, cherishing the beauty, the wisdom, the sweetness of a woman. But she... she didn't feel like that. Names like those didn't fit her. So, there was her name. Tanshin. Alone. Unaided. Condemned to never come back home. _What a fitting name._ A bitter smile touched her feature as she pronounced her name.

"Alright, get your reiatsu to your higher point." the shinigami requested.

She nodded, before trying to do as she was said. She didn't know exactly how did it work. She tried to concentrate. She had heard people were able to rise their reiatsu when they got angry. So she tried to get furious. She tried to think about everything that happened to her. But soon, she found out it was completely useless.

"You can go." the shinigami said.

The girl nodded again. Something said her the test didn't go good. Not that she cared.

* * *

The girl sat on the grass. She was in a meadow out of Seireitei. She didn't want to spend the night there, thinking about her "family". They would get so mad if they found out she was there... Tanshin lied on her back, looking at the sky over Soul Society. People said stars were brighter here than in the human world, that the sky was the most beautiful thing in Soul Society.

But she hated that sky.

She had passed so much time sleeping in the street, too famished to fall asleep, too scared to even close her eyes. So she had spent endless night gazing at the stars above. Without a roof on her head to protected her. Nothing could make her feel so helpless and exposed as the infinite dark blue sky of Soul Society, with only cold and distant stars watching over her. She felt so much like the little frightened girl she used to be, as a shiver ran through her back.

"Gotcha." a male voice sounded behind her and making her startle in surprise.

"Doesn't really count, rich-san." the girl replied, recovering from the initial shock. "I'm not even moving."

The man tilted slightly his head, even if she couldn't see him. "Sometimes stamina and perseverance are more worthy than speed and laziness. Ever heard about the rabbit and the turtle?"

She snorted, sitting straight. "Bullshit. I could ran off now and you'll never find me."

"I could always find you. Like I found you now. Have you ever heard of reiatsu, insolent brat?" his tone could seem impassible, but everybody who knew Byakuya enough, could tell his voice was mocking and he was secretly enjoying this.

"Ever thought of conceal it, wise fool?" she replied coldly, hiding her annoyance in her voice and features, even if it was evident from her words.

Byakuya picked a keen interest in her. There was something peculiar about her. She was teasing and cunning, but her face never changed expression. Her exterior and robes were humble and modest, but her attitude and pose were full of arrogance... not misplaced. Even her run was curious... Shunpo consisted in a row of little steps performed in rapid sequence. But her run was consisted in long range jumps, plus, she moved along curved paths, flexing her knees and it resembled vaguely the movement of a skater.

But with the grace of a punk hockey player, he mused. And the same fierceness.

And now, here she was, just a pair of feet divided them and yet, he couldn't feel her reiatsu at all.

The girl smirked with pride, tilting her head slightly. It was the closer thing to a smile he'll ever get from her. Byakuya's eyes widened for a second, before recovering soon. "I would have never expected something like this from the likes of you." he replied, needed to denigrate her, to put some distance. She was dead from just a pair of decades and yet, she was faster than him and could completely hide her reiatsu unlike the majority of Seireitei captains. People could lower their reiatsu... but she turned it off with no problems at all. It was like she wasn't even there.

However, she remained unfazed by his words. "So..." she began, "the Turtle and the rabbit? Your reading preference are unsual for someone who seems to have been around here for so much time, Mr Turtle." she replied at his comment, paybacking his insult using his own allegory.

He had to admit he couldn't really reply with some smart ass remark. "I've been a child too... two or three centuries ago."

She lifted an eyebrow, observing him closely. "Argh!" she groaned, before sprawling on the grass again. "I'll never get used to see people who are three centuries old and look like twenty!"

Byakuya was taken aback by that. _He _was the one who would never get used to see _her_. She... was smart and dead serious in a moment and... childish and relaxed the other. And yet, she still had something in her features he couldn't put his finger on. Was it her tense expression? Her tired air? Her firm lips which never turned up in a smile or down in a pout? Or maybe, it was the strange light in her eyes. Faint, pained and... resigned.

"You're staring."

"I was thinking. You were in the way." he replied. What else could he say? _Sorry_? Or a childish _I wasn't_?

She snorted. "I was expecting something closer to the line _Kuchikis don't stare_."

"This morning you didn't even know who were the Kuchikis and now you know their speaking habits?"

"I know yours, Byakuya-san."

He glared at her. _Byakuya-san? Who the hell did she think she was??! _

"Haven't they taught you glaring is rude, Byakuya-san? I'm quite sure there's a tale about this too." she teased him.

"Haven't they taught you good manners? Vulgars like you aren't supposed to speak to nobles like this and without a proper honorific. You should show me some respect." spatted with venom.

She gazed him with a tired and serious expression. "What have you done to gain my respect, Byakuya-san?"

His breath hitched and he was speechless for a moment. "How dare you, insolent brat! My title is a source of respect. You should not need any other reason."

"But I do." Was her simple answer.

"I could have you killed for that." he said. "Hope you're aware of this."

"You wouldn't." she replied calmly, before turning watching the sky again.

"What makes you say that?"

"Am I wrong, Byakuya-san?" she asked shrugging.

The sixth division taicho, turned angrily, his haori flapping behind him, before marching away from the girl's question. Both knew the answer, but no way in hell he was going to say that aloud.

Tanshin sighed. Tonight, she wasn't going to get any sleep. Especially not now, after that... man gave her so much thoughts.


	4. Prove your strength and admit your lies

**Chapter three: Prove Your Strength And Admit Your Lies**

* * *

Tanshin listened attentively the warning. Because the 4th division, the one which should supervise the kidou exam, was busy tending to the shinigami who just come back from a pernicious mission, the exam was moved to the following day. Instead, today will take place the hand-to-hand combat in the 2th division quarters. Tanshinsighted. She's never been that good in that. But maybe, with this shoes... moving at the right speed... she could pass.

Finding the 2th squad was an easy quest, seeing how many people were moving in that direction.

"Alright, losers, listen up." the second division taicho shouted. "Change in your gi, if you don't have one, you can find it in the locker room. No shoes. No weapons. Nothing. I can't stand cheaters. We'll began in five minutes. If your not here by then, you can go home already."

She was in trouble. She was in deep deep shit. _Fuck!_

* * *

"Ritsurei!" Yelled the taicho. Tanshin bowed. "Let's begin!"

Her opponent was another applicant and by his grin and build, it seemed like this was his speciality. _Oh, kami..._ she thought. Assuming her position, she observed the man.

He seemed strong. So, if he was to hit her, she wasn't sure she would be able to stand up again, so it was better attack first. She lunged at him with all her might. But he was faster, and soon, she found herself on the floor.

She growled. No way in hell she was loosing in 10 seconds.

The adrenaline rush made her stand up soon. She couldn't feel the pain. Rugonkai had taught that to her.

"Ya really think ya can beat me, sweetheart?" he said mockingly.

She tried to hit him again. Nothing. She moved her arms and legs as fast as she could, putting all her strength in her hits, but she soon found it was useless. She looked up and saw the people who were watching her defeat. The soutaicho, some other shinigami and there he was... Byakuya-san. Impassible as ever. Likely disappointed. And then, he stood up and made his way out. He didn't want to see her fight.

The man, abusing on her distraction, lunged at her. But she instinctively hit his eyes. Byakuya stopped, watching the scene closely. First, she can't even stay on her feet and then, she hit him without even looking. She hid her reiatsu. At that, Byakuya left. Knowing she had won. If you can't see nor sense your opponent, you're as good as dead.

* * *

"You left."

Byakuyaturned sharply. It's not often that somebody broke in his home and spoke with him like she was invited.

"You broke in again."

She shrugged. "You left the door open again."

"Why are you here?" he asked.

"You left."

"I know."

She arched an eyebrow. The conversation was going no where.

"And why's that?"

"I wasn't there to watch you, you know. I could be there and go away when I pleased."

"That," she began, "won't make you avoid the answer. Things will only get harder."

"Really?" he said absentally, before continuing doing his paperwork.

"Why were you there to begin with?"

"Because I could. And nobles are supposed to show their faces in occurrences like these." he explained calmly.

She nodded and said nothing.

"Care to go away, now?" he asked, rising his head from the paperwork.

"No."

"Good to know." he replied, his tone not matching his words.

"Why were you with me yesterday night?" she asked, sitting down at his side.

"You told me to catch you. That's what I was doing."

She seemed thoughtful for a while. "So... If I am to tell you to run away with me and buy a farm out of seireitei, you'll do it?"

He looked almost outraged by her words. "Of course not!" the girl lifted an eyebrow at his temper. "You challenged me. I had to defend my honour."

_Honour_. What a funny thing to consider. People have fight and died for honour. Honour was the first thing she lost after her life. "Oh, sorry," she replied sarcastically. "So... if I challenge you to leave and buy a farm?"

"And what kind of challenge is that?" he asked.

"If you don't run away with me, then you're a chicken!" she exclaimed, imitating the roaster verse.

"Oh, shut up, brat."

"Why don't you just answer?" she yelled in frustration.

"What happened to you? Yesterday you were so calm and... collected. Now you're acting like a child. Why?" he asked, completely out of character, almost loosing his cool.

"Because that's the last time we see each other. And I'm curious. And I don't have to worry about what do you think about me or if I'm rude. I don't have to worry that if you become my taicho, things could be awkward. Because tomorrow I'll go back home. And we'll never see again. And that's ok. I really don't care. But I'm bored, so I could as well tease you 'til I've got the chance." She said, like a child who's trying to explain something she's just drew.

"Why should I waste my time with you?" Tanshin couldn't hide her hurt expression for a moment, before recovering. "I've seen you fight today. You were as fast as a turtle in a coma."

"I thought you were the turtle here."

"Put on a pair of ears doesn't make a rabbit."

"You're right." she said nodding.

"Are your strange trainers?" he said, pointing at her feet.

"Yeah." she replied guilty.

"Don't ever try again to behave like we're equals. You're nothing."

Tanshin put her hand under his chin and got a lot closer to him. "You don't know anything about being nothing. Who do think you are? Everything you have, you have it for the simple fact of being born. You're a noble. Nobles are supposed to rule the common. I am one of them. And you've done nothing to gain my respect. For me, for them, _you_ are nothing. You've never protected one of them, you never fed one of them. Maybe you've never been in Rukongai. Maybe you've never... seen... hell itself. That makes you nothing. Not the words or some noble or your speed or your lies. What makes people nothing is so much more. It's the complete loss of dignity, _nothing _is the devastation you see in the eyes of a ten years old's eyes who's just been raped and the knowledge you can do nothing. That's nothing. I'm not nothing. I've seen it. I've been there. I've done something. And now, I'm here." Then, she got away from him, turned and ran.

Byakuya stayed still for a pair of minutes, without even blink, before resuming his work like nothing had happened. But something ached in his chest.


	5. Run off and look up

Tanshin sat on the floor, her back against the 4th divition district west wall. It seemed that they were the best trained about kidou, so they were going to judge the applicants.

"Ok, people, listen to me. I'm Unohana taicho. If you don't understand something, ask freely. Everybody of you will be scrutinized by one of my seated members. And since this year there are much more aspirants shinigami than last year, there will be also the 5th squad Fuku-taicho Hinamori Momo, expert in Hadou and Bakudou. We will ask you a simple healing kidou, then a hadou and bakudou you can choose freely. We recommend the lowest. And finally, if you have some kind of speciality like shunpo, or a family trick or you're able to conceal reiatsu, then you can show it to your examiners." the woman smiled kindly before leaving. Most people didn't know what was a hadou or bakudou or shunpo... so the 4th division member were soon surrounded by men and women. And in the crowd, Tanshin saw her sisters. _Fuck!_

Rapidly, she moved toward the door. She was almost out when...

"What? Do you give up? I'm here to watch you fail, certainly not to see you run away." A familiar voice said as the owner of it entered in the room. Suddenly people calmed down, staring at the man who had just got in. Some of them bowed at him.

Tanshin bowed gently, not in respect but in need to hide her face. Why had the man to attract all this attention on him? "Gomen-tessai. You're quite used in seeing my back, Kuchiki-dono. I hope you won't take offence in seeing it just one last time." she murmured quietly, hoping to not draw interest on her.

"It's not like you were playing fair, to begin with. Care to tell me why you're ditching your exam? You don't have magical gloves?"

"That's a long and nice story for another time." she muttered. "Now, I have to leave as soon as possible, before..."

"Is she Tanshin-chan?" a girl asked with a pitched voice.

"Shh!" another replied. "Shut up! Kuchiki-ouji would never talk to someone like that slut. He sure doesn't need her services."

Byakuya eyes didn't leave her face and she started to get uncomfortable, yet, she couldn't bring herself to lower her gaze. Come what may, she wasn't going to show weakness. So what? It was her past. She had needed money. She had done things she's not proud of. But during the last years, she gained some kind of dignity. And she sure wasn't losing it today. Not with him. Not after the things she said him yesterday.

He got closer to her. And then, panic took the best.

"I have to go." she said.

And then, her reiatsu vanished and she began to run out of there, running faster she's ever done. Like she was running for her life. Without turning back. Ever.

* * *

Tanshin entered in her messy room in Rukongai. She was dead tired. But she needed a shower first. So, she just threw herself under fountain.

Her thoughts versed toward the recent events, Byakuya-san and Seireitei. She thought about her past and how it would never make her able to fit in that world. Soon, her head started spinning, and before she knew, she was on the floor, unconscious.

"I was waiting for you, baby girl."

Tanshin eyes widened at the voice. She jumped on her feet, looking around. She was in a meadow, a lot similiar to the one of the previous nights. But this place was a lot darker and the grass, damp in the night, was quickly freezing over. "Who are you? Where-" she yelled panicked.

"Calm down, girl." the voice replied. "I'm here for you to yield."

"What are you ranting about? Where are you?" she shouted.

"Look up, girl. Because the ones who are afraid to look up at the sky will perish in the meanders of the dark earth, cold without the sun-rays which touch only who always aim higher."

Tanshin frowned, _how could she watch the sky, when the earth was freezing? _she wondered. "But if I look up, I won't be able to run away. And then... I'll freeze like everything else."

"Don't be distrustful, young girl. Since I could never lie to you. If I ever sin against you, my existence would be terminated, because my soul is chained to yours." the voice continued.

"How can I trust your words?" she asked. "You won't even show your face to me!"

"You have to learn to trust me with your life and I'll trust you with my strength, or else, you'll never be able to achieve your goals and aim to the sky." Then, without warning, a great force smashed her on the floor.

"Aim to the sky, my ass!" she muttered angrily. "What are you doing to me!"

"If you can't learn trust by yourself, you'll just have to learn it the hard way, little girl." was his only answer.

"Show yourself to me! Tell me your name!" she yelled, trying to stand up and finding it impossible. It was like someone was pulling her down, like she had thousand tons on her back.

"It's your fault you can't see me and even if I was to say my name, you wouldn't be able to get it right."

"Ah." she said, on her hands and knees, "so it's one of that long Japanese names." she said nodding and starting to crawling away. "I suck at remembering those."

"Mmm?" he replied, and she just knew, by the only sound of his voice, he was arching an eyebrow at her antics to run away. "It's useless. You can crawl and grovel all you want. You can't run from this. From you."

"You can run from everyplace. If I could run from the 84th district, I can sure run from here."

"Nobody can run away from their mind, girl."

She gasped. "My mind?"

"We're in your inner world, young girl."

"My... inner world? It's... so dark and cold." she noted, panting because of the force which kept her on the floor.

"Tell me, child, did you expect it be in any other way?"

"No, not really." she replied.

"Your world is freezing over. The ice that got under your skin is gradually freezing your soul. If you don't do something now, your soul will be lost forever."

"So... I just have to watch the sky?" she asked.

"It is usually the first step." he replied. "Look up, aim and take off."

"I don't know what the hell you're ranting about... but... I'm sure I can turn over and watch the sky." she said, between her struggings. Indeed, it wasn't an easy task.

"You would never be able to look up, not with that burden on your back. It will always keep you down."

"Well," she began, "then why don't you take it off??!"

"It's not my duty. You're the only one who can lift it." he replied. "This burden represents your guilt, your remorse, your past. If you can't free yourself by it, you'll end up smashed under the weight of it."

"Ah, you talk easy. You can't erase years of suffering like this. It doesn't work this way!" she yelled. "People got hurt everyday, scars mar them beyond recognition, they change but they can't forget their past. The pain won't go away just because we want it to. They endure it until their last day!"

"Then here it is, you're last day. You've gone past the breaking point. You've reached your limit. Your soul is freezing. It's dieing. If you can't stop it now, then you'll succumb. People can't be so in pain without loosing themselves."

She growled. "Never heard about somebody dieing for emotional pain."

"You're a soul. Souls can die." he stated simply. "Are you going to die? Now, after everything you went through? You survived hell, but you can't deal with your own feelings? How pathetic..."

Her throat emitted another growl. "No way!" she panted angrily. "You'll see, you'll see soon, you big oaf. Ah!" She yelled, as the weight on her should increased and she started to loose her strength. "I am so not going to die in my own mind!"

"Well..." he replied calmly. "it's not like you're doing something about it. I've been here. I've seen your decline. You changed. You weren't able to keep your identity. You allowed yourself to drown in misery. Do you really think you deserve to live? You should have died there. Not that girl. Not the owners of the corpses you found in the street everyday. Not the man who took you away from there. But you. Only you."

"It's not my fault, ok??!" she yelled. "It's not my fault! I would have chosen to die than to endure this! I didn't want this. It was not my choice to stay alive! But what could I have done? I couldn't do a damn thing! And so what? I hid and ran and killed and gave up." tears ran freely on her face. "It's not my fault." she sobbed. "I couldn't have fought them. I only did what I could. It was life. The only life I knew. It's not my fault I ended up there."

"Stay strong, child. I'm here."

"And where were you then, when I needed you the most?" she asked, still on her hands and knees. "Where??!" She yelled, punching the ground.

"You didn't summon me. And... you need me the most _now_."

"Why?"

"You'll find out at the right time, child. Now dry your tears and stand up." Tanshin nodded, before doing as she was said. "Look up, girl, don't be afraid."

Tanshin opened her mouth in awe. She had never seen something so beautiful and graceful and... wow. "It's... what...?" she started, before closing her mouth.

"What? Never seen a flying dragon?"

She grinned. "Never one so beautiful."

* * *


	6. Sister and stars

Here's another chapter... and remember to REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

* * *

He was looking his sister. She had taken her paperwork at the manor, and she had been doing it in his garden, and when the night came down, she stayed out, looking at the sky, the breeze gently caressing her hair, a serene expression on her face. How different had she become. After her stay in the leaving world, her feature had softened and sometimes, he had caught her with a human-like expression on her face. What a shame for the Kuchikis, but how refreshing it was... to have back a new Hisana. How miserable he had made her sister's life. And now, she glowed just like his late wife. He could see the relaxed air around her, the light in her eyes and the worry in her features. She was in love. And just like every other person in love, she was worried about the well being of her lover, about the reaction her family could have, about their future. Because being in love, makes you think to the future. Something Shinigami don't usually have.

But she had. And in the past, he had had it too.

"Rukia!" Here he comes, that buffoon of a fuku-taicho, bothering his sister peace. "How are you?" the man asked. And hearing she wasn't alone anymore, the Taicho was retreating, but found himself unable to do it. He found himself wanting to know the answer escaping her lips. She wouldn't lie to Renji, right? And if she did, he would had known.

"Renji... uhm... I'm fine." she replied with a smile, a little to wide to be real.

But that buffon just grinned. "Glad to be at home?"

At that, she lowered her gaze, a strange expression on her face. "Yes, of course." she replied, even if her body language screamed _NO!_

A pang of guilt hit Byakuya. "And you? Is everything fine?" asked his sister, remembering good manners.

"Yep!" the man replied. "The hell are you doing here? It's fucking freezing!"

He cringed, such a language... in his home! Inadmissible!

"What out your words! If Nii-sama hears you, you'll find cherry petals hunt you down! And they'll find you!" she scolded him.

"Ah, I just love danger!" he replied. Oh, how much he'll pay for that later! "So, her honor Kuchiki-sama, could I, a lowly peasant, ask you what may you doing here?" he asked theatrically.

"Oh, you look so gay!" she teased him. "However, I'm doing nothing, just looking up at the sky." she stated.

"Oh... all this stars." the man replied, looking up. "Don't they make you thing about our Rukongai nights? When everything was so simple... We were lucky."

The noble watched as her sisted nodded hesitantly.

"What's on your mind, Rukia?" the man asked bluntly.

"Nothing... I... nothing." she stuttered.

"Rukia..." he repeated gravely.

"I'm... I'm just wondering... if this is the same sky with the same stars. You know... here and in the living world." his sister admitted, feeling uneasy.

"Why?"

"Why?" she frowned. "Do I need a reason?"

"You changed. A lot." the man sighted. "The Rukia I knew wasn't the type to look the stars and spend nights wondering if she and her _friend_ were under the same sky. It just wasn't in her style. What does it matter? If you two share a sky?"

"What are you trying to say, Renji?" she spatted. "that the human world made me a weak sentimental fool? Well, you're a little too late for that! But who knows... maybe you talk big about knowing me, but you don't know a damn thing!"

"Rukia..." he started, taken aback.

"I'm here, Renji. I'm here and he's there, who knows doing what. Maybe fighting, maybe studying in his room, or spending time with his family. But he's there. And I'm here. We belong to different worlds. That means I don't get to know all this things. I don't know if he needs my help. And I know I shouldn't, because I'm a shinigami and he's a human. I'm dead and he's alive. I know we don't have a chance. Because we have nothing in common and our lifes are not meant to intertwine. So I'm sorry if I _need_ something." she panted for her outburst. "I need to know that even if we're in two different worlds, we still have something in common. That we're looking at the same thing."

The redhead shook his head gently, as Byakuya had a very surprised expression on his face. "Before... you would have looked the sky and thought about our childhood years. Together. We spent decades there, on the street, the sky our roof. And it took you less than a year to forget all about that for a mere human. I don't know who you are anymore. What's going on with you?"

A bitter smile touched her features. "I thought the exact thing about you the day you loose your chance and gave up on our friendship."

"It was for your well being! For your future!" he yelled in anger.

"No, you were just a coward! You were scared and you just..." she stopped, taking a deep breathe. "Leave me alone, Renji. This time I'm asking you to."

Byakuya watched as his fuku-taicho stormed away. His sister stayed there, devoid of any emotion, like a perfect Kuchiki. Was this? Was her unhappiness that had made of her a fine Kuchiki? It wasn't sense of duty and justice, nor the-shinigami-can't-feel-emotion rules that made her like that. It was just... unhappiness.

Then, his thoughts began shifting toward his newly acquisted acquaintance. Was she unhappy? Had he been too hard with her, too? He shook his head. It's not like there was something he could really do about it. Time will fix everything, he told himself. Being a noble often meant to know how to wait other people make the right choice and the right thing. Leave to others the dirty work.

* * *

The flying dragon chuckled "Thanks."

The girl grinned. He was indeed amazing. His water blue body was long and overshadowing, a flaming red and orange mane ran along his length, he hadn't got wings or anything, he just swam in the air like it was the depths of the ocean. His eyes, bright violet, shifting to magenta from time to time. He seemed a huge snake, but his skin wasn't reptile-like, but feathers covered his body. His expression was caring and warm. Nothing like she expected. Nothing like her inner world. Nothing like her life.

"Now, what are you doing there? Come up here." he said, cocking his head, like he really couldn't understand why the girl was on the ground.

"I can't fly." she simply stated.

The dragon snorted. "Aim for the sky or die in the ice." he replied in a _I-don't-really-care-what-you-do_ tone.

I looked around me. Ice was covering everything. The previously dark green meadow was now pitch black, the plants were withering around her feet for the cold and the thick layer of ice reflected the darkness of the night sky mixing up and down, ground and sky. _Aim for the_ _sky, uh? Well... _she thought_ the first step is... JUMP!!!_

The moment her feet left the ground, everything was a blur. It was like falling but in reverse. She felt like couldn't go down again even if she wanted. She felt light and a mysterious force took her higher. It felt good falling this way. Then it was like she was swimming against the waves. "What the hell is happening?" she shouted.

"Don't be afraid girl. If you loose faith, everything is gonna be more difficult. Find the strenght to come to me. Come and I'll give you my power. Fight for it." he replied.

She gritted her teeth. "I'm coming! Then you're going to stop with this shit talk!" she yelled in reply. "Just give me a minute!"

* * *

Two hours later she was on his back.

She grinned. "It's beautiful from here." she stated amazed, looking down at the brilliant meadow. The ice had melt, leaving dewdrops on the grass which glistened at the light of the full moon and starry sky. She had never felt this calm and untroubled. She leaned against his body.

"Are you tired, girl? Two hours moving around have taken their toll on you..." he replied with a little of irony.

"I was trying to get here, you big snake."

"You said you needed a minute... not two hours..."

She frowned. "You didn't stop moving!"

"At least, do you remember my name?" he asked. "I don't like repeating it."

"Of course I remember it. I'll always remember it." she replied, sounding hurt.

"Hope so..." he said. "Now go back, girl. I'll help you to get what is yours. Just promise me something."

"What?" she asked curious.

"When you go back to Seireitei..." he started, and she could hear a smile in his voice. "... make an unforgettable entry!"

* * *

She found herself laughting, on the floor in the shower, alone. Two blades in her hands. She grinned. She had a promise to keep!

* * *

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